This week, we proudly announce the launch of our new weekly column “Dating With A Purpose” by Vivanista’s very own Viva Dating Diva, Travis Brady. We hope you enjoy her first installment.

Last week on the road in Boston, I met up with my almost-new-sister-in-law. She’s great. I really lucked out in marrying the Coach’s family. They’re sweet, nice, real and down to earth. As we were closing up our dinner talking about topics from having babies to what we’re wearing at the wedding, she looked at me and said, “You realize this is the last time we’ll probably ever be on our own together?”

“Really?” I questioned.

I guess so because in our future family life together there are husbands, brothers-in-law, sisters-in-law, moms, dads and more children. And as we envisioned maybe sitting alone on the beach of my future beach house sipping wine at sunset, it came to me… expansion.

My whole life is expanding in a way I haven’t really acknowledged. I’m an only child. No sisters. No brothers. I grew up with cousins, but as they remind me from time to time, it’s not the same as the bond of a sibling. My family, our family is getting much bigger.

I realized I needed to check-in with my heart to see if it was ready.

Is it ready for the expansion that is needed to take in and open up to more people? My lady calls this “softening.” Softening your heart and being so that others can approach and come in.

Sometimes this is hard for me because I’ve spent most of my life being on my own going it alone. And there have been times when I’ve opened up and someone stung my heart. They pricked it with a needle trying to deflate it, to harm it. Before that could happen, I closed it off to them; to my parents, to other family members and to guys I’ve dated.

As I thought about this, one thing came to mind; it’s the very thing about Dating With A Purpose that makes it unique. The fact is that you have to be brave and bold enough to expand your heart to let others come in not knowing what you’re going to get. It’s almost like being an otherworldly adventurer going into uncharted territory on a seemingly solo mission. Only the pay off at the end is never having to go solo again if you don’t want to.

I just finished reading one of Paulo Coelho’s books…

Next week, Travis, the Viva Dating Diva, reveals a simple dating truth found in Paulo’s pages.

Related posts:

1. Quitting a Cold Turkey
2. Calling Your Patterns to the Mat
3. Going Out on a Limb
4. The Center of Your Dating Universe
5. Not-So-Great Expectations